As you read the excerpt above what comes to mind?
I first read this passage a while back, but was reminded of it recently when I listened to the below clip:
I then thought about an incident I witnessed a few months back.
A professional athlete, during a professional sporting event, bumped an opposition player from behind after this player had committed a foul on a teammate and then stood over him.
This player was suspended for his actions, criticized in the media, and had another action that his peers could add to a growing reputation (this was not the first time he had done something like this).
I found the whole situation interesting.
This player was labeled all sorts of different names, basically insinuating he is a ‘dirty player’, by opposition coaches, players, and the media.
He himself admitted the action was wrong – but when he explains why he did it, the past experiences that trigger that action, and the value system which underpins it, it gives you reason to pause.
No one would condone violence or hitting another player from behind.
But would you condone.
- Mate ship – sticking up for a teammate / friend.
- Confronting disrespectful acts.
- Prideful individuals.
I know I would – and I think everyone else would as well.
So, what if I told you that it is the above values which led to the player bumping an opposition player from behind and being suspended for his actions?
This players past experiences helped create the above value system, and that value system led to the action we’ve been discussing and all the negative labels / comments that came with it.
My intention here is not to condone violent acts.
It is simply to illustrate the complexity that MAY exist.
Sure, there are horrible past experiences, which create poor value systems, and lead to BAD actions.
But there are also enlightening past experiences, which create good value systems, and can still lead to BAD actions (especially when you include the context it occurs in).
My point is, like the exert I led this article with we mustn’t be so quick to label or judge a person based on an action, without a clear understanding of what surrounds that action and how that circumstance is triggered by what has come before.
Kenny Smith couldn’t have said it better.
‘Not all people that do bad things are bad people, but if you keep doing bad things then you are a bad person.’
I took that a couple of ways, two of which I have already explained above, but the third interpretation I made is you may repeatedly find yourself in situations where you appear to do bad things (with a good value system) and from here you have one of two choices;
- Accept the labels and reputation society will give you (remember we are programmed to judge the action by itself)
- Or find a way to adjust your actions without ruining your value system.
Both are incredibly tricky and require a great deal of control, but they may be the only ways to navigate the labels society will give to you.
